


Willow's Gift

by intabularasa



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Genre: Character Death Fix, Cleveland Hellmouth, F/F, Fix-It, Post-Canon, Post-Canon Fix-It, a few changes to season 7 but mostly canon compliant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-23
Updated: 2018-04-23
Packaged: 2019-04-26 16:20:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14405892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/intabularasa/pseuds/intabularasa
Summary: after saving Sunnydale and restoring the balance between Good and Evil, the Powers That Be offer to grant Buffy an unconditional wish.basically Buffy is just a super awesome friend and she hates to see Willow in pain.





	Willow's Gift

**Author's Note:**

> anya didn't die. willow and kennedy didn't happen.
> 
> this is based on something joss said at a con once about bringing tara back. tbh he might've pulled it out of his ass on the spot but i liked it so i just ran with it.

It had been rough for the Scoobies after closing the Hellmouth in Sunnydale. Between the core gang, their allies, and the potentials, there had been mixed feelings following the final battle. Some felt that they were done, spent and deserving of rest. Others craved more action, itching to take on the next big bad. But others, and most prominently in the core four of the group, just felt lost.

After spending so long monitoring and fighting with and living on the Hellmouth, it was almost sad for them to say goodbye. They weren’t quite sure where to go from there but none of them felt  _ done _ . And so they traveled to the Hellmouth they knew to be in Cleveland. 

They lost some of the group along the way, potentials- now slayers- branching off here and there to stay in towns that they passed by or travel to others. Kennedy had said goodbye to the group, taking Chao-ahn and Shannon with her to find a Hellmouth that Giles had heard was in Nevada. Faith and Robin had continued on Southeast after the group arrived in Cleveland, taking on another Hellmouth that Giles mentioned in Florida. 

They found other slayers along the way as well. The members of the Watcher’s Council that hadn’t been in the meeting-that-went-boom had rebuilt the organization, sending watchers to any awakened slayers that they knew of, helping them understand and hone their powers. 

This led to more than a few chance meetings between slayers defending their town and Buffy who was battling vampires in graveyards to pass the time as they made their way East. A few had decided to come along and they now worked side by side with the Scoobies to maintain order above the Hellmouth in Cleveland.

After the loss of Andrew and Spike in the final battle as well as a handful of potentials, the group had grown closer. Learning to lean on each other more and rebuilding a trust and sense of family that had nearly gotten lost when preparing to take on the First. Anya and Xander had been growing closer again as well, recognizing how close they had come to losing one another and slowly moving towards making a second go of it. Giles and Buffy had been training with the younger slayers who settled with them in Cleveland, allowing Dawn to join in as well. 

Violet and Rona along with the newbies they’d come across had gotten a place together in town, the new hub for group meetings and training sessions. Anya lived in her own apartment above a consignment store that she had started working at while she and Giles worked to open up a magic shop similar to the one they once ran in Sunnydale, the others in the area being too “hipster” for Giles’s taste. Giles had been doing well too, working for the revamped council and living in his own little place near the empty store he had scouted to open shop in. 

Buffy, Dawn, Xander, and Willow had gotten a house together. Dawn went where Buffy went and, after everything they had gone through, Buffy needed her friends. They needed her too. Xander was struggling to find a construction job in the area that would hire a guy with only one eye. And Willow… Willow was just struggling.

Not magically, no. After the spell to awaken the slayers, the light magic she had been filled with was indescribable. It had acted as a guide within her, combining with the teachings of the coven as a way for her to begin the path back to using magic with respect and without fear of black hair and veiny-ness. She had gone back to basics and learned when it was and wasn’t okay to use magic. Now with such a force of light inside of her, she felt confident and safe in her powers in a way she had never felt before.

But she was struggling in other ways. Ways that she tried and failed to ignore, only those closest to her seeing through the facade. Seeing what was truly stirring beneath the surface. Grief. 

She’d never gotten the chance to grieve after losing Tara, not really. After going off the deep end with her magicks, she had been focussed on studying with the Coven, and then rebuilding her relationships when she arrived home and then battling the first. Never enough time to sit alone with her thoughts. Not until now.

It had been nearly two years since losing Tara, and it only felt as if the hole inside her chest was growing. Even when she had indulged in a minor flirtation with Kennedy, the hole only ached rather than closing. And she’d felt so guilty over just a few flirty words that Amy’s spell had turned her into Warren. It was obvious then that she wasn’t ready to move on, had gently turned Kennedy down and focussed her energies on the First. But even now, it felt as if she would never be ready. That she couldn’t move on with someone else. She didn’t even want to.

Her friends could see it. Buffy saw it. Heard it too, during the chats she’d have with Willow and Xander long into the night when none of them could sleep, desperate to tell someone about the mess going on inside of each of their heads. But even if Willow had never confided in Buffy and Xander about how she was feeling, they would have been able to see. 

Buffy had never seen her best friend in such pain before. Even when she gave into the dark magicks, Willow had shown only anger and revenge. But now, the ache was so clear. The pain in her eyes. Buffy could barely manage to look at her some days.

All of this was only made harder by the offer that had been granted to Buffy after they had closed the Hellmouth.

The Powers That Be had summoned her. They told her that she’d be granted a wish, an unconditional, no-strings-attached gift for saving the world. Again. 

Apparently defeating the First’s plans to open the Hellmouth had caused it to fall back in the war between good and evil, returning the balance that it had tipped. This, according to the Powers, meant that Buffy should be rewarded. Three months to make a decision, to choose the one thing across all the dimensions that she desired. 

It was agonizing.

The gang knew of the offer, tried to make suggestions to ease Buffy’s burden. But the choice was hers. And, initially, it had been a simple one.

* * *

 

“Anything? Sooo… I wish that Evil would take a hike.”

The abyss she spoke into had been empty, but she felt the energy of an amused, indulgent smile. “ _ Impossible, child. _ ”

Buffy rolled her eyes at the echoing, disembodied voices, “You said ‘anything.’”

“ _ Anything that does not tip the balance of good and evil in the world. _ ”

“So I can’t just say ‘poof’ and make all the demons and baddies go buh-bye?”

“ _ You cannot. You have restored balance in this world, this is the very reason you have been granted this reward. Good and evil must both exist, for one without the other would mean chaos for all. _ ”

Buffy sighed, rubbing her temples. “So, what’s the point then? What do I wish for?”

“ _ That is up to you, child. This is a gift, choose one that will bring happiness to yourself, to the ones that you hold dear. Choose what you long for, a happiness, a safe haven. _ ”

At that, she had stiffened. Her thoughts immediately traveling to the photo she kept beside her bed. The photo of her and Dawn with their mom. “And… people? Could I wish for a person?”

“ _ You could. _ ”

“Even if… Even if they’re dead?”

“ _ Even if they are dead. _ ”

Her brow had furrowed, her mind flashing with images from the day when she had lost the most important person in her life, almost unwilling to believe that it was possible to have her back. 

“But what about the natural order of things? I thought that we couldn’t mess with life and death.”

“ _ Humans cannot alter the natural comings and goings of life and death. We can. _ ” The surround-sound quality of the voices speaking back to her in unison had suddenly seemed too overwhelming. Her heart rate was rapid, palms sweating. 

“Does that mean-”

“ _ Yes. If you wish it, we will send your mother back to you. _ ”

A little cry escaped Buffy’s lips, her hand pressing against her mouth in an attempt to prevent any more involuntary sounds from slipping through.

“ _ Human life is neither inherently good nor evil. It is how an individual chooses to live their life that could be good or bad. And so a human life either existing or ceasing to would not tip the scales. This is a wish we could grant you, Buffy Summers. _ ”

“But what about- When I was dead… I was happy. I didn’t want to-”

“ _ If you choose to resurrect someone who does not wish to return, we will not make it so. Forcing someone back from the afterlife would be an act of evil and we must remain neutral. _ ”

“So if she didn’t- If I wished for someone and they didn’t want to come back…?”

“ _ It would not be so. _ ”

“And my wish?”

“ _ Would be wasted. _ ”

Her head had been spinning at that point. But remembering the loss of her mother… The events of that day, every day before and after. Each moment was running through her mind in rapid succession. Thoughts that she often suppressed for fear of revisiting that ache in her heart. She’d missed her so much. She had to at least try. 

“I wish for my-” 

And then her mind had revisited the memory of the morgue waiting room. The room where her world had been crumbling and nobody had been able to understand. Not anyone but Tara. Tara had helped, given her a safe place to land when nobody else had been able to. She had been there for her, for everyone. Always.

She thought of Willow, breaking apart at the seems. How she had listened to her best friend sob through the night on more than one occasion- never worse than on Tara’s birthday. She thought of the shirt that Willow had balled up into her bag as they prepared to flee Sunnydale, an awful tie-dye long sleeve that she knew had belonged to the blonde. She thought of Dawn, still mourning the woman who had been like a mother to her when she had lost her own and lost Buffy so soon after. 

And suddenly Buffy felt selfish. 

“I need… Can I have more time?”

* * *

 

Remembering the moment she had been offered the gift made Buffy more sure of herself as she made her decision. She had asked the group to meet at Giles’s apartment, wanting to be together when it happened. Needing to be reassured that this was the right thing to do.

It had been. She’d known it from the moment she said the words aloud and the object of her wish walked through the door. 

They’d said their tearful “hello”s. It was another reason she’d wanted to do it away from the house. To give themselves the chance to give their proper greetings before the real reunion took place.

Xander had delivered a nearly crushing bear-hug. Anya was surprisingly gentle and quiet in her greeting hug with a look of happiness on her face. Even Giles had shed a tear and offered a soft embrace. Buffy wept as a repeated string of “thank you”s were whispered in her ear. Dawn wouldn’t even let go. Not until Buffy announced that it was time to go home, time to see Willow.

* * *

 

“Buffy?” Willow calls in the direction of the entryway, having been sprawled out on the couch holding a registration booklet from Ohio State held above her head when she heard the front door open. 

Ohio State has some decent programs. Some credits from UC Sunnydale were transferable and she thinks she may use them to double major- Chemistry and Science of Technology. They even have a Folklore minor if she wanted to study the occult. Although, that might be a bit silly having done and seen everything that she has.

“Yeah, it’s me. And I come bearing company.” 

Willow frowns, Buffy’s voice sounds off as it filters through the house. Like her usual levity is forced. The redhead sits up, swinging her legs around to sit properly on the couch. She turns to face the back of the couch and watch as Buffy walks into the sitting room with Giles, Dawn, Xander, and Anya in tow. 

“Everything okay?”

“Yeah! Of course, why wouldn’t it be?”

Willow raises her eyebrows at her best friend as the girl joins her on the couch, Dawn perching on the edge of the cushion on the opposite side of her sister. Xander takes a seat on the arm of the couch to Willow’s right while Anya sits in an armchair and Giles stands stoically against the wall beside it. She looks at her friends, noting their fake smiles and instantly becoming concerned. 

“Guys… What’s up? Is something wrong?” Her eyes widen and she shifts one leg beneath herself, nervously turning to face Buffy, “Is someone hurt? Did one of the girls-”

“No! No. No, all of the girls are fine. All of us are fine.”

Her brow furrows, head shaking slightly, “Then what…?”

Buffy sighs heavily, standing and beginning to pace the floor where they’re going to put a coffee table once they all find one they can agree on. Glancing at the others in the room is the opposite of helpful. Nobody will meet her eyes and it only worries her more.

“Will, remember that… That ‘gift’ the Powers That Be offered me?”

Willow’s eyes widen. She’d forgotten all about the “unconditional wish” lately. So focussed on registering for school and trying to get herself, her emotions, her life back in order. Trying to ignore the small speck of hope that insisted on perking up whenever she thought about the wish. Buffy could wish for literally anything in the world- anything  _ beyond _ this world. And yet the nagging spark of hope persisted, wondering what would happen if Buffy would wish for  _ her _ .

But that would be ridiculous. Buffy should wish for… for easier slaying. Or for Angel to be human. Or for Joyce. God, Buffy should wish for Joyce. It’s  _ Buffy’s _ wish and she deserves to be happy with whatever she chooses to do with it.

So Willow pushes the surge of selfishness aside just as she always does. Only this time, instead of pretending that the wish doesn’t exist, curiosity takes over. “Of course I remember. Did you…” She studies Buffy’s face closely on each turn the slayer takes towards her, “Did you decide?”

“Well… I mean, it’s hard, y’know? I could have asked for  _ anything _ . That’s a lot of possibilities. Lots of buyers remorse if I’m hasty,” she says it with a chuckle but the attempt at levity falls flat. She shakes her head, sobering herself as she takes a breath, comes to a stop. She’s standing in the middle of the room, facing away from Willow, when she continues, “I thought about a lot of things. A-about magicking up a degree for myself- or a real job. About bringing Sunnydale back- sans Hellmouth. I thought about dad…”

Willow sees Dawn smile kindly at Buffy’s back. Willow can see an underlying excitement in Dawn beneath all the tension. Did she wish for their dad?

“But… no. I had to consider everything- everyone. So… I mean, Xander’s eye crossed my mind but-”

Xander chimes in with a shrug, “I’m getting used to the eyepatch.”

Buffy sighs, turning to face the couch again. She seems to be gathering her thoughts even as she launches into a babble that rivals even some of Willow’s best.

“Exactly. So I thought about opening the shop for Anya and Giles, about making you all agree to that really nice coffee table that none of you seem to have the taste for,” Willow and Dawn roll their eyes in unison as Buffy continues, “I thought about bringing Spike back for what he did for us, about resurrecting my wardrobe that’s down in the crater, oh and- and those cute shoes I saw in the window at the mall! The ones that are way too expensive but have those adorable little-”

“Buffy.”

The slayer stops rambling, stops her wild hand gestures and locks eyes with Willow.

“Buffy, you didn’t use your wish on shoes.” Buffy doesn’t respond and Willow raises her eyebrows in disbelief, rising to her feet in front of her best friend, “You didn’t use your wish on shoes, did you?”

Buffy smiles indulgently and shakes her head, “No, Will. I didn’t use my wish on shoes.”

Willow shakes her head, somehow more confused than she had been through this entire exchange. She takes a few steps across the room to reach the slayer, placing a hand on her arm to ease whatever nerves Buffy is clearly feeling about revealing her wish, “Then what… Buffy, what did you wish for?”

Dawn moves to stand next to Buffy, grin spread across her face. Buffy smiles too. And Willow looks around, Giles and Anya are wearing soft smiles and Xander is now stood behind Anya’s chair wearing his supportive, Xander-y smirk. She turns back to Buffy.

“What…?”

“Hey, stranger.”

Willow’s body goes stock still when she hears the voice speak from behind her. Her eyes widen, her palms instantly become clammy. She shakes her head, locking already teary eyes onto Buffy’s.

Her voice is a whisper when she speaks, “You didn’t.”

Buffy offers a watery grin and a little nod, “I did.”

Willow’s hand covers her mouth, subduing the sob that threatens to escape, “She can’t- she can’t be.”

“She is, Will.”

The voice is closer when she hears it again, “I am.”

Tears are making a slow descent down Willow’s cheeks and she turns just as slowly, closing her eyes, afraid that any sudden movements will wake her up from this dream that she’s had so many times before. Afraid that if she opens her eyes she won’t really be there. Even as she can feel her. Even as she knows exactly who it is standing behind her.

The presence palpable, surrounding her in a feeling that she had nearly forgotten. A feeling that she aches at the thought of having come so close to forgetting. There’s barely a voice to the breath she lets out, blindly facing the direction the voice had come from. 

“Baby?”

The back of a gentle hand comes to stroke her cheek and a sob wracks Willow’s body. The touch is soft and it feels like a home she’d been longing for. It sends butterflies and bats flying in her stomach and has fireworks exploding in her chest. 

“It’s me, sweetie,” the hand drops, intertwining with one of her own in a way that she remembers well, a perfect fit. Soft, familiar lips brush against her wet cheek, a gentle and teary whisper finding her ear, “Open your eyes, Willow.”

Goddess help her but she has never been able to deny that voice. And so she doesn’t, she slowly opens her eyes, still afraid to wake from the dream but hoping beyond belief that it isn’t a dream at all. At first, all she can make out is a blurry figure. But even still she recognizes her instantly.

She blinks a few times to clear her vision and when she finally can see fully, she nearly collapses at the sight before her. Willow releases another sob as her body pitches forward, wrapping around the woman stood before her. Her entire being- her body, her heart, her soul- feels whole again, her missing piece restored to her. Her love. Her everything.

Tara.

Tara. Here and real and tangible and  _ here _ . It was everything she hadn’t allowed herself to hope for and the only selfish thing that she’d allowed herself to pray for. 

“Oh god, Tara,” she’s still shaking and tears are still flowing freely down her face but she doesn’t care. She pulls back just enough to see Tara’s face, noting that her love isn’t faring much better in the composure department.

Willow gently takes her face between her hands, running her thumbs over the soft skin that she had craved so desperately for so long. She shakes her head slightly in disbelief. Hands that had once memorized her body move to wrap around her lower back.

“You’re here, you’re really here.”

“I’m really here.”

Willow chokes back another sob at hearing Tara’s voice again, having ached for that voice to grace her ears just once more. She leans in, just barely touching her lips to Tara’s, almost afraid that she’d break if not careful. But Tara knows her well, she always has. She feels Willow’s fear and makes the move for the both of them.

The first full touch of their lips is like heaven on earth. And in a way, Willow supposes, that’s exactly what it is. Their lips press into each other and move against one another, a well-practiced dance that neither could have forgotten if they’d tried. 

When they need to breathe, Willow allows them to part for only a second before leaning back in and placing a series of kisses to Tara’s lips. Messy, uncoordinated kisses that they relish in. It isn’t long before the distance required for their lips to meet becomes too great and Willow wraps herself around Tara once more, savoring in the feel of their bodies fitting into place as they used to. 

“I can’t believe this,” Willow speaks into blonde hair, hands bunched up in the fabric of the long white dress covering Tara’s back. 

She can feel the sweet smile against her neck as Tara speaks, “Believe it. And you should get used to it too. I’m here to stay.”

Willow pulls back suddenly, meeting the gorgeous blue eyes that she’d lately only seen in dreams and photographs, “You’d better be.”

Tara’s gaze turns serious, “I am.”

The certainty in her voice eases the coil that had been tight in Willow’s chest. It releases and she falls into Tara’s embrace once more, whispering “thank you” into her hair and “thank you” with her head tipped up to the sky and- 

“Oh,” Willow pulls back but immediately takes Tara’s hand in her own, unwilling to break contact just yet. She spins around, only taking her eyes off of Tara for seconds at a time but her eyes finding her best friend in between.

“Buffy, you…” Willow’s face reflects the disbelief she feels. She shakes her head, searching for the right words. There are none. “Buffy…”

The slayer is wiping a few tears of her own after having watched the exchange, Dawn pressed to her side and smiling with glistening eyes. Buffy shakes her head and steps up to Willow, taking the witch’s free hand in both of hers. Tara offers her free hand as well and Buffy smiles, taking the offering and bringing the interlocking digits to her chest. 

“Don’t thank me, Willow.”

Willow blanches, “How- how can I not  _ thank  _ you, Buffy? Thank you! God, thank you. Thank you so-”

Buffy shakes her head, “No. You need this.” She glances around the room, “We all need this,” she looks to Tara, “We all need  _ you _ .”

Tara offers a half-smile as she ducks behind her hair but Willow is still staring at her friend in disbelief.

“Buffy, you… You could have asked for anything. You could have asked for  _ anyone _ .”

A teasing grin is offered in reply, “And what’s better than wishing for this?”

“Nothing! I mean…” Willow looks at Tara again and instantly her breath is stolen and her eyes are glassy. Her love sends a secret smile her way and she grins in return before turning back to Buffy, her expression sobering. “For me, nothing. Nothing could have been better than this, but… But this wasn’t for me, Buffy. This was  _ your _ wish.”

“So?”

“So?! So you could have… You could have wished for- for-” Willow calls up the list of things she had been reminding herself of earlier, possible wishes that would make it ridiculous to hope that Buffy would ever choose to fulfill Willow’s deepest desire, “You could’ve wished for Angel! For him to be human or… For it to be okay for you two to be together. Or for your mom! Buffy, Buffy why didn’t you- I mean you should have-” Willow shakes her head, cutting herself off. 

Now that Tara is here, she can’t justify selling other possibilities to Buffy. She’s eternally grateful to the girl for bringing her soulmate back to her. She doesn’t understand but, Goddess, she’s grateful.

“Will…” Buffy drops the hands in hers and runs her own over Willow’s arms, stopping to take hold of her forearms but careful not to jostle the girl enough to break her hold on Tara. 

“I didn’t… My mom… I thought about it. Believe me, I almost did it.”

“Why didn’t you?”

“Because… Because we’re all okay. We miss her and the hole in my heart where she should be… that’ll never go away. But it hurts less than it used to. I learned to live with it. Dawn and me, we’re okay. And… It was her time.”

“But-”

“It wasn’t Tara’s.”

Willow shakes her head, her grip tightening around Tara’s hand, “No, it wasn’t.”

“And Angel… It crossed my mind once or twice but… I don’t need him. I don’t think that I’ll ever love anyone like I loved him but it isn’t the same. I’m surviving without him and Willow, you were drowning.”

“I was-”

“Okay, I know. But just barely. And only on the outside.”

Willow drops her gaze to the carpet. She can’t argue with that. She had barely been keeping her head above water without Tara there to help her swim.

“I know how badly you’ve been hurting. I could see it. And I knew that no matter how much time passed, no matter how much you claimed to be alright, you would never stop aching. I could  _ feel  _ it, Willow.”

Biting her lip, she looks to Tara’s kind eyes and then to Buffy’s. 

“I don’t need Angel, Will. But you need Tara.”

Willow nods, tears falling once again. She releases her hold on Tara for the first time- grateful when the dropped hand rests against her back to keep their contact- and throws her arms around Buffy. Strong arms wrap around her and she feels wet tears on her top but doesn’t mind in the slightest, knowing that she’s leaving similar spots on Buffy’s shirt as well.

“Thank you,” she whispers into Buffy’s ear. 

“You saved the world, Willow Rosenberg. You deserve to enjoy it.”

Willow pulls back to lock eyes with her best friend, “I kinda love you, Buffy Summers.”

Buffy grins, “You’re not so bad yourself.”

Willow’s smile stretches across her face, meeting her eyes for the first time in longer than any of them could remember. She turns back to Tara, taking both of her hands and pulling her close. Tara smiles and rests their foreheads together.

“So, Miracle Girl,” Willow begins with a cheeky grin, “Where do we go from here?”

Tara’s lopsided grin appears again and she leans in, pressing a chaste kiss to Willow’s lips. “Absolutely anywhere we want to.”


End file.
